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physically or emotionally. a joker. maybe. a pacifier. at times. and... usually make the issues, people don't notice much.


  • Ang Paboritong Libro ni Hudas
  • Solitaire Mystery
  • Veronica Decides to Die
  • The Best Laid Plans


July 30, 2009

Wander Woman

            Wasted for some things undone. 1, 2, 3 days coming, and counting. I don't exactly know what is yet to be done. I have tried to take a rest, yet nothing is changed. I had that thing called "something", yet everything seems to be so bothering. How and what and where shall I have a good rest then. I feel so depressed that every time, I think of that thing, nothing seemed to be working. Time stops, and my mind's wandering. Have I done the right thing, or I have done the right thing?

             People say, I am a not so typical type, who can be bragged by whoever goes out on my way. They think I am a one superwoman, who can bypass every murmurs and smirky smiles around me. Not even bothered of whose eyes are on me, but saying all these words, seemed to be one mistake. I guess, I really just have nothing to do with it. No worthy thing. Others may think, I am a happy go lucky woman, I  am  "wander"woman. Many things popping out of my head, that I wish will never come back again. Yet, every time I think of it, it goes in. And how is that? Am I losing my insanity? Or this is just one of my personal issues? I don't know. It will always be a maybe. Having a commitment, is really not a "5-star thinking" , not a two-thumbs up, nor a referred item for a suggestion box. Difficult, it is. Waste of time, yes. Yet, nobody dares to stop it, and I wonder why.

            For so many times, I tried stopping it. But the bastards won't stop. They still dare and try, and for this one man who actually got in my way. Goodluck then. Right now, I'm actually thinking of what you just have said, 4 hours ago, and I don't know, not really. If I am still, into you. You are, maybe, and maybe not as much as before. Just have to remind myself, that there should be no other man, who would let me down. And if you dare to, I won't complicate it. It would be done, not for you, but for me. I have lived my life with grace, before I met you , and so I have to live that way after meeting you. Yet, there's still a no good bye, and this is not it. My mind is still working on it, under construction. For at this moment, I might as well say, I don't have to love you more than you do, IF you really do.